.: ONE MONTH

Our tiny & precious babe is one month today and I can't believe it! This first month has flown by. It's a little surreal to be sitting here typing a one-month update. Really, it's like that saying, "the days (and nights) are long but the weeks are fast". Adjusting to the schedule of a new baby has been the most challenging part. Seems like the days have all just blurred together. I think Ethan and I have felt every possible emotion lately. We have been tested in ways that we never really truly expected. The limited amount of sleep alone has been a serious trial, but we wouldn't trade this experience for anything. We love Grace. I really enjoyed doing the monthly pregnancy updates and bump pictures so I am excited to continue that with Grace throughout her first year!

Weight & Height - At her last doctor's appointment, she measured 21 inches and 7'8 and is still in size newborn clothes and diapers. Being with her 24/7 makes it hard to notice the little changes going on but looking back and comparing photos we can see she has started to grow and got adorable chubby cheeks...on both ends! We are also pretty sure she's got her daddies blue eyes and the verdict is still out on her hair color. It appears brown or strawberry red depending on the lightning she's in. Either way, she's gorgeous.

Sleep - Over the past month, Grace has managed to turn our world upside down in the best possible way. She is such an easy-going baby, who sleeps most of the time as long as she's held by her momma. In fact, as of lately, that's the only way she'll sleep. We are still working on transitioning into her dockatot.

Eat - She went from 2 oz feedings to wanting anywhere between 3-4oz if she can stay awake for them! Sometimes she really chows down and gulps like she hasn't been fed in days. We are officially done breastfeeding and it's a very bittersweet feeling for this momma. More on that below

Recent Milestones - She definitely remembers our voices from those nine months inside the womb and is getting more familiar with our faces. If she see's me pass by or hear my voice she'll turn her head in search of me. Grace has a really strong neck already and likes to push away from us when she's being held on our chests. She loves taking showers with the constant stream of water on her back. Enjoys listening to her daddy sing. When she sneezes she makes always ends it with the most adorable sigh that I am determined to get on camera. #fingerscrossed

Special Moments - During week three we shared a special little moment with Grace. Ethan and I were sitting in bed with our heads leaned against each other as I held grace facing up at us in my arms. We were talking about how much we loved her and so I said "We sure do love you kiddo" and then she got the biggest smile on her face. We still don't know if it was on purpose or just the perfect timing of a little gas smile, but either way, we just melted over her.

Holidays - Grace was able to celebrate Christmas and New years with us! Not that she'll remember any of it but it sure did make this year special. And she already got spoiled at just three weeks old! We can't wait for next year when she's old enough to really care...even if it is just about playing in the wrapping paper! She was also born on St.Nicholas day. Ethan's family actually lived in Germany for a few years with the Army so they are big on celebrating this day. The tradition is to set your shoes out by your door the night before and St.Nick will come and fill them with candy. It's been a tradition that all of the Janson family has done and we look forward to doing it with Grace.

Dislikes - When we have to change her diaper or clothes. She is pretty much 50/50 right now on whether or not she'll get upset! She doesn't like to wait for her food or when you take the bottle out to burp her. It's as if she thinks she'll never be fed again! She really hates her car seat right now so we are in the process of figuring out how to help her enjoy it. It may just take time but that's exactly what I'm afraid of. She enjoys being swaddled but don't you dare cover up her arms. She NEEDS those right up to her face!!

Mommy Update: I never really understood what it meant to be a mom until now and each day I'm learning more and more. I especially have a deeper gratitude an compassion for others who are parents. I am no longer breastfeeding. We gave it a good month of trying all different things and in the end, the best thing for me and baby was to bottle feed. More on this in another post to come. Luckily, I have an amazing friend that pumps a ton of extra milk and is graciously letting us use her extra. We feel very lucky to still be able to provide Grace with breastmilk because so far formula just upsets her stomach. In the end, Fed is best!

This first month has been hard for me. The struggle with breastfeeding, the lack of sleep, the constant worry with a fragile little newborn and just the constant awareness that someone else relies completely on me now 24/7. However, as this month has come to an end, I feel like I have gotten the hang of things. As Grace has put on weight, she is sleeping longer through the night which means so am I. I am able to get things done around the house now and even occasionally have dinner ready when Ethan get's home. I'm trying to remind myself that although there are a million things I want to get done around the house and socially, she will only be my brand new baby once and that I should appreciate all the cuddles throughout the day that I can get! Overall, it has been an amazing month of growth for me and I owe it all to my baby girl.

Things I look forward to in month two is Grace smiling more on purpose and her little coo's you can tell she is already working on. I'm hoping she'll get a new PR with her sleeping schedule at night (5 hours) and learn to like her bed. Co-sleeping was never something I personally wanted to do but I've learned having a baby makes you do things you need to in order to sleep. Don't worry I take precautions to be safe, but I still worry. Which is why I desperately want to break the habit.

** Goals for next month **

1. Have Grace sleeping in her own bed at night & some naps (unless we're cuddling)

2. Help her to enjoy her car seat. At least be able to make it to Target and back.

3 . Cook dinner 3 out of the 5 work days for Ethan.

Monthly Photo Dump

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